Hello out there in Blogland! Over on Facebook in recent days, there have been a hodgepodge of posts about women who date thugs and/or get with these "dead-beat" men only to turn around and make them into their "Baby Daddies." A lot of the men on there have tuned in on the topic expressing their views, commenting that women aren't interested in the good "men," and have asked, "Why?" Many responses from women poured in...among them were explanations ranging from these guys "puttin' it down" in the sack to looking for love in all the wrong places. Of course much of what we said was well received, but I felt that it was my civic duty to toss one back at 'em.
I wanted to know why do some of these men ignore the good women out here? I mean why do they pass US up to date the next hood-rat, duck-head, tramp ass, gold-digger, sleaze bucket, or scag they encounter in the streets? I wondered why they are not pleased with the fact that WE are highly educated and that we're handling our business; paying our bills; taking care of kids, house, and home; and can cook a bomb ass meal for them and--of course--I would be negligent if I left out--"represent" between the sheets. Oh noooooo...they are looking for the next jump-off--that trick that they can call at 3:00 a.m. so they can get down and dirty. Listen here, ain't nothin' open at that time but Convenient Stores, jail doors, and the legs of whores!!! Can we please get it together?
So I would like to ask you all to chime in...if you dare...
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12 comments:
I must admit, I used to be into the "thugs," but that went away when I went to college. Afer realizing a thug wasn't going to be conducive to my direction, I had to drop that desire.
As far as certain men acting oblivious to the good women, I think it's because we're too much of a threat to them, and because we're not an easy catch. Normally, a man likes a challenge, but you have many men in our society who don't want to work for anything...including a good woman. Those are the type of men that good women should stay away from anyways...who wants a weak ass man?
BCU~I knew you would BRING IT!!! I certainly wish I had realized that I needed to get rid of that desire by college...but I won't cry over spilled milk...better late than never! And sistah you better PREACH...these men need to realize...no BITCHASSNESS!
First, I think there needs to be a distinction between males and men, males will take whatever is available and men will put forth the effort.
Secondly, I also think it's the way society grooms are males. Think of this way, in school, who are the popular guys? They're the ones with "all" the girls, but let girls have "all" the boys and they're hoes and tramps?
Last, the only real way to move past this dilemma is to have genuine conversations like this one...
Shawn~You are absolutely right! And the sad reality is on average, I'm not sure we run into many "men" these days. I would add into the part about society "grooming" men how do our parents groom them? Not to say that my parenting skills are on a different echelon (in my heart though, I feel that I do very well)...but I believe that parents play a role as well.
And thank you Sir, I hope the conversations continue elsewhere...
Honestly, I've never had a problem in either direction. I guess I am pretty lucky, and smart not to go after the bad boys. Sorry I can't contribute more than that! Maybe it's an unwillingness to expect a lot? I don't know.
Hi Tera. Linked over from NoRegrets blog.
I'm a guy. Recently separated so I'm not looking to jump between the sheets with anyone. Not yet anyway, but when I get around to it, I'll be pretty selective in where to meet nice ladies. Through friends, bookstores, grocery stores, church, places like that.
I'm certainly biased, but not all hope is lost.
NoR~Well thanks a lot for your non-contribution (wink wink)!
3GK~Welcome to P&P! That is very refreshing to hear! You do know however that some of the "bad girls" hang out at church right? ;-)....I hope you continue to peruse!
Ha! Right after I posted that comment I figured whores need to eat and read too, so maybe my plan isn't so clean.
LMAO!!!!
LOL!
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