Spring Has Sprung

The firewall at work in all of its wonderful randomness recently blocked me from my blog...it took a little "sweet talking" and perhaps a smidgen of lip gloss to get said IT Guy to unblock me, but nevertheless...

That time of year has come...fresh "weather-" scented breeze, birds chirping, joggers jogging, kids at play, dogs walking their owners, oh and let me not forget...love...sweet love in the air. I don't know what it is, but something always ignites a little flame in me (either that or this damned vow of celibacy I've taken) and my hormones run wild.

Well I can no longer contain this burning desire...in all its intensity. I have a crush on someone. It comes and goes, but I have had it for about 2 1/2 years now (ever since I moved to Kentucky). I have never acted upon it. 10 years ago, my confidence was off the charts, and my ease and comfort with approaching men was at its all time high...not anymore. I'm not sure where it has gone, but I fear if I don't find it in me to do something, and something FAST, he may just slip through my fingers....

He works at my kids' school...he is the...ahem...Engineer of all things that must be mopped and swept. There is a certain charm about him. I guess the attraction grows more and more with my new found love for bald men. :) I have struck up a couple of conversations here and there because he adores my children and often times joins the Before and After School program staff in games of basketball or football with the children---they adore him too. Must I also mention he has a son who attends the program (who is a year younger than my Lil D). I found out from the kids that his son's mother died in a car crash years ago.

So...what's the problem do you say? I bitch up EVERY time I am presented the opportunity to utter the words, "Excuse me, are you single?" My guess is that he is with all the flirting he does with the women on the B&A School program staff which are only there ironically because of my repeated concerns (complaints) about the absence diversity among the staff! Is he interested in/attracted to me? I'm not sure, but he does smile at me an awful lot, and looks at certain "more defined" body parts that I possess.

I finally mustered up the strength to send him an e-mail yesterday...but due to the absence of a computer in his "office," I doubt he checks his work account...I also have not received a read receipt.

I need your help! What do I do next....?

It Takes Two

On the radio the other day, they were talking about Child Support. After the information was presented, callers were approaching the matter from two angles...one being no matter how much the single mother earned, the father should be held responsible for contributing his portion (and yes, they held that position for single fathers). The other stance was if the mother was making an amount of income substantially higher than that of the father, he shouldn't have to pay (and vice versa).

I never intend to come off as having a pessimistic view on relationships as a whole, but I must admit that in my decision to have my children, I did it with the expectation that some day I WOULD be doing it alone. And granted, both sides presented very valid arguments, so I was very tuned in and was for the most part able to agree with some of the points made in an objective manner...until one gentleman called, and in summary, this is what he had to say...

"I think that women should not have children if they are not able to support them on their own. I think they should have a financial plan/budget in place, and if adding a child makes their situation difficult, they should opt not to. And why does child support always have to be financial? I mean the father could be spending time with his child, taking him/her to the park and just being there...why does it always have to be about money? The bottom line women should allow the father to support the child on their own terms and not hone in on financial support."

So I turn to you all for feedback...what about those women who were married and/in a relationship that went sour, got separated/divorced and still has bills to pay? What if the father not only neglects to provide financial support, he also neglects to provide any other support?

-OR-

In the instance of say a woman (or man) who makes or inherits millions and clearly has more assets than the father (or mother), should she (or he) be entitled to support? What about the fathers who are placed in jail and/lose their licenses for non support...should they have to pay just to get back on track?

In most states, they add up both incomes and scale the contribution accordingly, for instance if one party makes 80% of the total of the 2, then they have to pay 80% of the costs for the child. Is that fair? Should it be 50/50?

I can tell you first hand that what they send for child support anyways doesn't light a match to what it takes to financially support a child. When you think about food, utilities, clothes, tuition, child care, activities, hair cuts, toys etc...those bill add up, and the measly $40-50 (on average) per week just doesn't cut it! Think about when it's time for a car and/license...college? Let's be real!!!

Your thoughts?

Hodge Podge VII

It seems that every time I set out to resume blogging on Matters of the Heart (as planned) a multitude of life events come crashing in, and I just need to release!!! So to all 2 of my faithful readers, please bear with me...

I heard snippets from a Reverend Manning (from New York)'s sermon on the radio this morning and this man stammered the most ridiculous and distasteful things I've ever heard from a man of the "the cloth..." he said that Obama's mother was (and I quote) "White Trash" and that he was a "long-legged pimp who pimps black AND white women," and on top of those comments made tons of hasty generalizations about the the Black race...downing men AND women! He also posed the question of how we could vote for Barack HUSSEIN (with emphasis---like that) Obama when the Clintons have done so much for the Black community. Now COME ON!!! Russ Parr totally stepped up to the plate and called him out on this, but it made me realize...he's not the only one giving "testimonials" for a little "peace offering" or "building fund donation," and how many of these Pastors abuse this power by manipulation??? Whatever happened to Separation of Church and State?

It appears that when you move south of the Ohio River, you are susceptible to sheer panic and utter ridiculousness when you see 3 flakes of snow! I mean we're talking about the entire city shutting down, people stocking up on groceries, and the salt trucks laying salt arbitrarily in little patches throughout the city, I guess in hopes that the wind will take care of the rest. I have never seen such! My travel time home on Friday was literally cut in half because the streets were clear...no pun intended.

Let's talk about pisstivity for a moment. My son will be 11 in April. The law says he can't be home alone until he's 12. Might I also add he is very bright, and EXTREMELY independent for a child his age. I'm behind on the daycare bill since the car accident in November (yes, for a child who is 2/3 of the way on the road to a driver's license), and they threatened to discontinue them. Now let me ask you this...those of you who participate in latch-key land...would I be wrong to let him try it? I mean the authorities may have something to say, but I wish a m!*%@%&$#@ would!!! My (honest) simple reply would be..."What do you have on the daycare bill?"

I had to pay $300 for D's dental work the other day...that's WITH insurance. I think that's all I have to say about that.

On a brighter note:

W has been accepted in the advanced program, and D lead his basketball team to victory in the semi-finals scoring the winning basket right before the buzzer. They won 12-11 (he scored 10 of those points---and don't laugh, they play 6 minute periods). They didn't win the championship game, but regardless, given they just made quorum right before the game against a team that had 6-7-8 year olds the size of Shaq, I think they did a helluva job!!!

In comments...what do you think about this? Anybody else pissed off today?